Urban Dictionary "Word of the Day".

Yes, I have a subscription to Urban Dictionary's word of the day...this was today's ..I found it quite funny.

There must definitely be more republicans on the "word of the day" subscription, judging by the sheer number of thumbs down on it! Hahaha.

I think I'm going to cut down on my "subscriptions" though! Too much junk!

David Hong Punk'd

This is for those who aren't on facebook.

Getting majorly Spoiled.

There is only one thing better than going to a French restaurant. That's getting chefs to cook you French food in the comfort of their own home. Astonishingly, this happened to me (And Malice). Basically, it was a dream come true AKA AWESOME.



This is Madel, in front of the "entree spread", which was too vast and numerous to actually go into detail about. Let's just say, we were dangerously stuffed by the end of it. By the end of entree. Yes that's right.



Steak Tartare with lavosh, as made by Phillipe Mouchel (where they work). Lemon, dill, capers, this was ...divine.



Okay, a lot of stuff on this entree plate, um, duck liver pate, ham terrine, duck..er...fat blobs (forgot the french name?), white anchovies, red onion sauteed with something.



Sweet corn and witlof salad.



Pork ribs glazed in all kinds of things, potatoes, rocket and mango salad.



This dessert was pretty much the best dessert I've had in such a long time. It was like a trifle/tiramisu fusion-but even better. And those candied almonds!

THANK YOU guys!! Time to write some Thank you cards!!!

Melbourne Cup Day

Melbourne Cup day is one massive booze fest. It's a crazy day, and a day where you are almost bound to lose money! It's actually very fun, if only because everybody has to make this massive effort initially, only to slowly unravel throughout the day.

PICS!

Coda

Coda is the restaurant of the moment, because of a good Age write-up apparently. Also because, since every person in their right mind loves both Vietnamese and French cooking, or, if not one, then at least the other, it pretty much caters to everybodys taste. Also, one has that smug feeling that comes with having two completely different cuisines over a single dining without the fanciful fusion concept that is probably on the way out as a trend (assuming food tastes are as cyclical as fashion trends).

I came away from the evening with only one thing in my mind, "this was a very very Melbourne experience". For some reason the combination of politeness (of staff), adeptness (of staff), the casual dress (of staff), (I would give the staff pretty much 10/10), the austerity (of the surroundings), the food concept, the menu, the entire unassuming nature of it all and teh fact it was just a touch classy-subversive; I some of those elements best defines the best loved eating/drinking establishments in Melbourne.

Anyhoo, here is what is on offer at Coda:



Citrus cured Hiramasa kingfish, fresh wasabi, pickled radish



Nothing too exciting here, except I forgot what those flower petals were! Kish fish sashimi is always bloody lovely.


Coda nicoise salad



This was terrific, although the portion looked ridiculously small, it was in fact quite sizable! (it was like a mini mountain).



Crispy prawn and tapioca betel leaf



Is Betel leaf actually a staple in Vietnamese cooking? Can anyone verify? I thought it was a more Thai thing. Who the hell cares, this was fresh and tasty at the same time. Winning combo.


Duck liver parfait, brioche and apple and fennel salad



This is Pauline's favourite dish, since she loves rich, decadent French type dishes . This was a nice welcome little dish, the little Brioche was sweet and above all, CUTE.


Sugar cane prawn with sweet chilli sauce



Apparently this is one of the dishes the Age raved about. I would not have raved about this in particular, although it LOOKS nice. A combination of prawn and sugar cane simply cannot go wrong. It was more like a mince, however, not really real prawn (well, I couldn't really taste the prawn and the prawn texture obviously wasn't there). Probably the best thing about it was the dip-fried noodles which LOOKED good.


Roast lamb, broad beans, mint and watercress



This is one of those dishes where the people who made up the menu couldn't be fucked with the pretense anymore (French, bah! Vietnamese? Bah!) and just chucked this on the menu instead. They also just chucked in some BRAINS for good measure. This was the first and last time I've ever eaten some lamb brain. Firstly, I can't believe how small a lamb's brain actually is. Secondly, mushy and GROSS.



A steak!



I like the simplicity of this dish. Simply fantastic. (I'm being sort of sarcastic and serious)


Ice cream sandwich




For some reason I love the fact they put this on the dessert menu (and it's a small menu). This is an example of the classy subversiveness thing. I ordered this because I thought it had to be good, well... it was.

Souffle



I didn't try this but I like the fact the menu just said "souffle" without any explanation. But thankfully the waiters more than made up for it.

Basically, this is an excellent restaurant and it's hard to complain about any of it.

Finally, Pauline shows us how to dress up for dinner Melbourne stylin', and just because it was a Tuesday night does not excuse anybody from making an effort, I give Pauline 10/10.

This is very funny.

Funny because it is true.

Favourite bits:

Northcote
Northcote does not make sense. Positioned in the heartland of suburbia, a whopping nine stops away from the city (comparable to North Brighton, Ormond and Murrumbeena) it has somehow managed to defy geography and pass itself off as a gritty inner city urban wonderland. The brilliance of this suburb is only magnified when you go there and discover it’s mostly just a few kebab joints and a massive indoor shopping centre with Kmart, two Coles, Donut King and a fucking Bakers Delight. This is stuff the wrong white Melbournians like! I don’t know how, but Northcote has brainwashed Melbourne white people. Go there to experience genius.

- I live there and I don't know what the hype is about. I generally spend about 4-5 nights out a year there, if that!


Shanghai Dumpling House
White Melbournians love this place because it’s cheap, but mostly because it’s in an alley. The patronage is also about 15% Asian, which isn’t enough to freak out white Melbournians, but enough to make them feel as if they are escaping white culture. The owners like it too, because they know they can save money by reducing the amount of chili and other seasonings in their product, as the average white Melbournian discovered soy sauce in the mid nineties.


Southside versus Northside
When meeting white Melbournians for the first time, it is customary to ask where they live. If you want to make friends with them, never tell them you live 'Southside', or south of the Yarra river (they just call it 'the river'). True white Melbournians live north of the river ('Northside'). If you're living Northside and want to meet a Melbourne white person for a drink, get them to suggest a place then say, "Yeah I know it. I can walk there from my place." They will think you are one of them. Even though Northside is mostly just lightless terrace houses, white Melbournians love it because they are just happy they're not living in Knox anymore.

Warning: if you can't hide your Southside status and still want to make friends with Northsiders, the culture shock you must feign when visiting them is HUGE. Never underestimate it! There has not been such a fierce rivalry between North and South since the American civil war. Here's a tip: when hanging out on Smith street, imagine what your facial expression would be if you were in Haiti, or Jericho in 9000 BC. Then magnify that look of amazement by about five hundred. You will make heaps of friends.

While Sydneysiders love to bag out Melbourne, our city has won that rivalry thanks to the white Melbournian tactic of only comparing Melbourne to itself. And sometimes to Berlin. But I like Sydney. It's Australia's only global metropolis.

My very first Urban dictionary contribution.

Actually, this is my very first contribution of a term ever. Thankfully, the world has me to thank for it. Although, ultimately, this was first heard by myself in reference to my good friend Pauline. Bless her.

I did not make up the second example btw, gotta love the Liberals for actually referring to themselves as loose units. Brilliant.